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What Happens in Spiritual Direction?

Writer's picture: Rachel ParsonsRachel Parsons

Updated: Dec 11, 2024

What is spiritual direction? What happens in a spiritual direction session? Is spiritual direction tied to a specific religion? How is spiritual direction different from therapy or chaplaincy? Also, what does "Fratres Dei" mean?

Spiritual direction Denver, Colorado

Earlier this year on Fratres Dei Spiritual Direction's social media pages, Fratres Dei created a series of posts called "FAQ o' the Week." Throughout the series we answered your burning questions about spiritual direction. For your ease of consumption, we've compiled the content of each of these posts right here on the Fratres Dei Spiritual Direction blog. However, if you'd like to see cute photos of my (Rachel's) cat, I encourage you to follow us on social media:



Now, on to your questions!

 

What is Spiritual Direction?


Spiritual direction is “a long, loving look at the real.” It’s the millennia-old practice of partnering with another to navigate one’s spiritual journey or relationship with the sacred. It’s like therapy for your spiritual health (and is not a replacement for mental healthcare). Spiritual directors help the spiritually curious connect with their essential selves. Through counseling-style interaction, directors create a space within which directees may openly, honestly, and safely explore, process, and deepen all parts of their personal spiritual inclinations and longings. Matters addressed by spiritual direction include but are not limited to:


Self Integration / Body-Mind Integration


Discernment


Faith Crisis


Deconstruction


Spiritual or Religious Doubt


Head-Heart Connection


Friendship / Intimacy with the Sacred


Nonreligious Spiritual Growth


Occupational / Caregiver Burnout


Imagination-Based Meditation


Interfaith Relationships


General Spiritual Growth or Refreshment


Body Movement


Spiritual Maturity


Spiritual or Religious Transition


Spiritual or Religious Trauma


Spiritual Practice Exploration


Issues of Anger with the Divine / Misotheism


LGBTQIA+ Spirituality (Affirming)


Ecospirituality


Bodywork



Schedule a free first session here.



Is Spiritual Direction Tied to a Specific Religion?


No. Spiritual direction is the practice of serving as a companion to another as they discern their own personal journey. It is not tied to a specific faith tradition, and the goal is not to push dogma onto the directee. Spiritual direction is an evocative process, as the director seeks to help the directee understand how they encounter spirituality or the sacred. Rather than telling the directee what to think, believe, do, say, or know, the director helps the directee explore aspects of their experience of spirituality or the sacred or of something that points to these. Although teaching and instruction do occur, the director often observes and highlights what happens when a person becomes aware of a dimension of themselves or of the sacred. This results in a deepened intimacy with the self, the universe and its inhabitants, and the sacred.



What Happens in a Spiritual Direction Session?


Every session is as varied as the number of people on earth, but here’s a description of what generally happens in a session:


Many directors will start with some kind of centering practice to help the directee settle into the space. I (Rachel) personally like to use a body-based approach to centering practices, as this invites the whole person, body and mind, into the session. I believe that when the body feels safe and welcome in the spiritual direction space, the session is infinitely more fruitful. (Furthermore, if the body doesn’t feel safe, I don’t think the session should happen at all.)


From there, the director and directee will discuss whatever aspect of the directee’s spiritual life they would like to focus on. If they are not sure exactly what that is, the director might guide an exploratory meditative practice to help the directee discern.


Sometimes the session simply has a “talk therapy” structure. Other times, if the directee believes it would be beneficial, the director may use modalities to encourage deeper exploration. In my own practice, I enjoy utilizing freeform imagination-based meditation as well as body-centric discernment techniques. Spiritual direction is best served agenda-free, as each directee will benefit from different approaches and styles. Part of the joy of spiritual direction is discovering what those unique styles may be and how the directee can use them long after the session is over.



Spiritual Direction vs. Therapy

Spiritual direction and mental health counseling walk a fine line, because your spiritual health impacts your mental health, and your mental health impacts your spiritual health. However, spiritual direction and therapy serve different primary functions. Spiritual direction seeks to serve the whole person, body and mind, by helping the directee cultivate their spirituality. Spirituality helps individuals and communities find meaning and cohesion in all areas of life, which includes mental health. However, in the same way that you wouldn’t go to your PCP for surgery, spiritual direction is not a one stop shop for mental and emotional wellness. While some spiritual directors are licensed mental health counselors, not all are. While it may be appropriate to discuss mental health challenges in a spiritual direction setting, a spiritual director will not diagnose or treat mental illness. Part of spiritual direction training involves learning when it is appropriate to refer the directee to a mental health counselor.


That said, these two forms of care work beautifully in tandem with one another. Many individuals greatly benefit from alternating between spiritual direction and therapy sessions for holistic care. 



Spiritual Direction vs. Chaplaincy


As someone who has served as a hospital chaplain, a hospice chaplain, and a spiritual director, I think chaplaincy and spiritual direction are close cousins. So close, that I sometimes think the two terms could be used interchangeably. (I’d be interested to hear any hot takes from other chaplains or spiritual directors about that. Please share your thoughts in the comments.) I had a friend who once jokingly described spiritual direction as “chaplaincy for people who aren’t in crisis,” and I honestly struggle to find a better definition.


While spiritual direction certainly can provide care for people in crisis, the context for spiritual direction is typically less specific than that of chaplaincy. With plenty of exceptions, chaplaincy usually is practiced in the context of hospitals, hospice, schools, the military, etc. There are heavily emotionally charged circumstances in each of these settings, and chaplains serve as spiritual support for individuals in the thick of these circumstances. Again, while spiritual direction also could be helpful in and around these settings, spiritual direction tends to be less specialized in its scope. Spiritual direction lends itself to difficult times, neutral times, and euphoric times. It can serve as a temporary space of discernment for specific issues or life decisions, and it can be a normal part of one’s routine for general spiritual growth.


Again with plenty of exceptions, interactions with chaplains can be relatively brief (especially in a hospital setting), and relationships with spiritual directors tend to be more ongoing. There is nuance between the training and skill sets required for chaplaincy and spiritual direction, especially when chaplains need to prepare for specific contexts. But insofar as both fields invite interfaith and exploratory approaches to spirituality without direct instruction or dogma, they feel like different sides of the same coin to me. What do you think? Let us know in the comments.



What Does "Fratres Dei" Mean?


In Latin, “fratres dei” means “siblings of god.” (The gender-neutral word for “siblings” and “brothers” is the same word.) I chose this name to evoke a sense of esteemed divine companionship, rather than a top–down, hierarchical understanding of divinity. “God” here is interpreted as a higher power, ultimate reality, consciousness, inherent unity, or a personal spiritual center. “God” is a cultural term that an individual may use as a shorthand for each of these things, whether or not they believe in a deity from a specific faith tradition.



Have more questions? Please do not hesitate to reach out to rachel@fratresdei.com or call (720) 534-9491. Interested in scheduling a FREE spiritual direction consultation session? Schedule here.



December 9, 2024 | Denver, Colorado


 






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